What would happen if I stopped? If I deleted my website, shut down all of my social media accounts, quit writing, refused to teach, ate whatever, bought a ticket back to California, got a high paying corporate job, stacked up cash, bought a house, and designer clothes, got married and pregnant?
What if I didn’t listen to my heart? What if I settled for less than I was made for?

I’d be extremely miserable.

How do I know? I’ve been there. Early on, age 22. I had everything I could ever want and I still wasn’t happy. All I earned for was world experience. All I desperately needed to know was who I was and why it mattered. I wanted to love myself and not need anyone else to validate it.

So I sold everything and lived out of two backpacks. I roamed solo for a year. My parents thought I was nuts! For 3 months I stopped working out, stopped eating clean, pursued other things I thought I was passionate about. I erased my schedule and burned my planner. No more structure. No more discipline. No more of who I used to be. I was slipping into a new character in my story.

What happened?! I’ve never been so depressed and unhealthy.

And yet, what I learned was that freedom blooms from structure and discipline. That I can only be happy and healthy with a frame work to hold myself accountable to. That I can’t just drift and expect things to go my way. I must lead and take responsibility for my choices. I must run my day or the day runs me. I must wake up determined to make positive impact and create my ideal reality. I learned to listen to my intuition and heart more than ever. They always guided me. Especially as a dancer. I had forgotten.

But sometimes you need to get FAR away in order to look back and know that you are on the right path. I had to know through experience that I didn’t want to live an empty existence. No one could tell me. I had to learn by throwing myself off a cliff and developing trust of the universe and myself on the way down. I would have regretted never going. Never knowing my depth and potential.

So I won’t stop. I’ll keep believing. I’ll keep loving and sharing because it’s why I am here. I know that now. I am ready. Born ready. Who is with me?!

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